Part 1: Getting Started
Everyone has to start somewhere. If you're not a kid, it's a lot easier to get started if you compare it to what you already know. Let's do that for a while. It's not as good as reading actual Japanese, but it will help a lot.
(This guide assumes you know the kana, you're learning vocabulary on your own, and you have a mouseover dictionary like Yomitan. If you don't, go fix that.)